When Emilia was about 6 months old, Kyle and I set about getting life insurance. At the time, I joked about it: look at us! We are so mature! And grown-up! ADULT, EVEN! GO US. I also related the story of how, as part of the process of applying for life insurance, a nurse visited our home to take blood samples and I fainted. Twice. These were the things that I felt most comfortable sharing about that process: that it made me feel like a grown-up, and that it also made me faint.
The thing of it was, though, that it was much more complicated than that. It was, as they say, loaded. The reason that getting life insurance is a grown-up thing to do, the reason why it feels so adult, is because it requires confronting the sort of reality that only adults, for the most part, are equipped to confront, or that one becomes more adult in the process of confronting: the reality that your life is, in fact, finite, and that it is entirely within the bounds of possibility that you might reach the horizon of its finitude before you’re ready. So you best be ready. Especially if you have children.
In a nutshell: you could die, and leave your children without a parent. To say that this is sobering is to understate things in the extreme. This is the sort of thing that makes one want to crawl under the covers with one’s fingers in one’s ears. This is the sort of thing that one wishes that one could just push away and deny. But this is also the sort of thing that speaks clearly and loudly of the full force of parental love. This is the very definition of that love: it is a love that confronts fear and does not retreat. It is a love that looks at all the scary things in the world and asks itself, what must I do to protect my loved ones from these things? And, what must I do to deal with the reality that, despite all my efforts to fight it, bad things can still happen? It is a love that doesn’t wear rose-colored glasses. It’s a love that looks at life and the world and time and everything and strains to see as clearly as possible. It’s not the kind of love that we usually associate with Valentine’s Day; it’s not warm and fuzzy and wrapped in red satin bows. But it’s the most important incarnation of love, arguably, because it is this love that takes care, and gives care, and actively fulfills its promise to honor and protect.
The question of life insurance came up again, recently, because of all the recent changes in our life. When we first got life insurance nearly six years ago, Kyle was the primary breadwinner; I was a dependent spouse. That’s changed – that’s reversed – and there are a lot of things about that change, that reversal, that have been difficult for us. But we had to confront it, and name it, and sign off on documents that said, now, YOU are the primary breadwinner, and YOU are not; YOU need to be more fully insured, whereas YOU do not. That was not easy. We had to wade through the thickets of we live a different life now, a life that’s proving difficult to navigate at times, a life that’s proving difficult, at times, for us to navigate as partners because the very nature of the partnership has changed. But we did it.
Because we’re grown-ups. And that’s how we love now.
February is all about love, with couples flocking to jewelry stores and florist shops to pick out that special something for their special someone before heading out to their favorite restaurant. But this year, why not schedule one more stop before heading out to your dinner à deux — your insurance agent’s office?
While there’s no denying that a bouquet or box of bling is always welcomed, there is another gift that can have an even greater impact on the one you love: life insurance. It ensures that your loved one (or loved ones!) will be taken care of financially, even after you are gone.
And while the vast majority of Americans—86%—believe life insurance is important, according to the “LIMRA and LIFE Foundation 2011 Insurance Barometer Study,” more than a third have no life insurance coverage. The consequences of that gap in coverage can be devastating. Without sufficient life insurance, many families face potential ruin when the income from their loved one is no longer available.
Even those who currently have an insurance policy in place may have underestimated the amount needed. You need to take into account two key figures: the amount of money needed to cover final expenses and outstanding debts (also known as “investment capital”) and the amount needed to sustain the household. Visit the easy-to-use Life Insurance Needs Calculator to get a working idea of what amount of coverage you might need.
And it’s not just the breadwinner who needs to have an insurance policy in place. Stay-at-home parents make significant contributions to the family’s economy, in terms of childcare and household tasks, whose value has been estimated at more than $40,000 per year. With an insurance policy in place, there will be sufficient funds to ensure that these responsibilities are met and the family’s quality of life is preserved, despite the loss.
As for singles, it’s a common misconception that those without children or a spouse have no need of life insurance. Singles may be providing financial support to siblings or aging parents, or have significant debt that, without the insurance pay-out, may pass to other family members. By evaluating your current financial situation and taking into account the needs of those who are depending on you, you may realize that purchasing a life insurance policy makes good sense.
These are serious considerations for a hearts-and-flowers month, but what better time to demonstrate the love you have for each other and for your family than by ensuring that you and those you care about are adequately protected? Then make this February extra-special by giving each other a special “gift of love” in the form of life insurance.
Disclaimer: Before reading, you should know that I’m definitely not a “Yeah, Vegas, baby!” kinda person.
I think one-armed bandits are aptly named. The last time (and the only time) I was in Vegas, someone actually gave me money to put into a slot machine, and I wouldn’t do it. I put it in my pocket. My philosophy is that hard-earned cash—mine or someone else’s—has no place in the belly of a machine (or on a blackjack table) where the odds are definitely not in my favor. I just can’t do it.
That said, I actually do get it—the whole Vegas thing, or friends hanging around a poker table having a good time. The adrenaline rush of winning; the excitement of the game. To each his own, right? But, there is one area of your life where you should never, ever gamble, as our poker-playing fruit fly Frank discovers in the video.
Jokes aside. Feel free to keep what happens in Vegas in Vegas. But what happens at home is a different matter. Make sure your family’s future is protected. Don’t gamble with that. Get life insurance.
We do a lot of great things to show our families and loved ones how much we appreciate and love them, from planning great family vacations to taking our significant other out for a romantic night.
All these gestures show our love, but there is one thing that you can do to cement that love into the future, even after you are gone, and that is to buy life insurance.
At the LIFE Foundation, we’re celebrating those who’ve taken that extra step and gotten life insurance coverage, with our online Insure Your Love Mosaic. More than a thousand people have already uploaded photos to the mosaic of those they’ve protected. It’s so interesting to see how each story is different, yet at its essence the same: taking good care of the ones you love. Take a look at these:
And, of course I added my own:
And how about you? It takes only a couple minutes and by doing so, you can help spread the word about the importance of protecting the ones you love with life insurance.
For each photo that gets uploaded to the mosaic, LIFE will donate $1 to the LIFE Lessons Scholarship Fund, which gives tuition assistance to college-age students who have lost a parent.
And if you post a photo and caption by Feb. 29, you’ll be entered into LIFE’s photo contest, with a chance to win one of five $100 gift certificates so you can take your loved one(s!) out for a nice evening.
And how about you? It takes only a couple minutes and by doing so, you can help spread the word about the importance of protecting the ones you love with life insurance.
For each photo that gets uploaded to the mosaic, LIFE will donate $1 to the